Please wrap it up!

I parked my “mean black squeaky machine” on the sidewalk, spat the tombakoo on the wall which said “Keep Bangalore city clean “and made my way to the old forgotten handicrafts store. The neighboring shop was Praveen’s Pet Vet Clinic .I could hear the whine of dogs and feel their pain. I approached the old man who appeared to be the owner and pointed at the beautiful metal idol of Lord Ganesh. I believe I was the first person to touch the idol, since the year1991; it was “that” old. Mr. Murthy, that’s how he introduced himself, told me that I was holding one of the oldest statues in his shop, which apparently was inaugurated by the then Police Commissioner K. Chakravarthi, the year being 1991.As I was late for the house warming ceremony, I asked him to gift wrap the idol, but Mr. Murthy, who was a retired clerk at the AG’s office, decided to test my patience. Mr. Murthy: You know young man; it’s very difficult to give the right gift. It has a lot of variables involved in the process. Take for instance the cost, if it’s for a relative you spend a lot knowing fully well that the relative will return the favor. If it’s for a social contact you look for an inexpensive gift. And then you have to think of the occasion, is it a birthday, anniversary, marriage or house warming ceremony. Moreover you have to be careful of duplicity. Of course every Ram, Shyam and Sajjan Rao thinks that the Wall Clock is the ideal gift. At my elder son’s marriage, we received 4 wall clocks. You know what we did with it? We put them in a box and put it in a safe place .When we were invited to a function we pulled out a clock, gift wrapped it and gave it away. The other day my younger son Madhu, was asking his mother what the ideal gift to give for his friend’s marriage was and as usual Lakshmi gave him an envelope and asked him to put Rs 200. Not that money is a bad gift, but that should be the last resort. (He looks for the cello tape, I glance at my watch) Is it getting late for you, let me wrap it up … (looks for the scissors) he continues...

I still remember when I was invited to my friend Satish’s marriage; I was in a fix, not knowing what to give him. He was my one of my close associates you see and so I wanted to give him something that he could remember me by. So after work, I took an auto and for Rs 2 he dropped me at Hospet. I went to this shop which was selling all types of Kitchen utensils. In those days people used to give steel utensils like big Tiffin boxes for marriages and other functions.This marwadi shopkeeper showed me different types of Tiffin boxes, square, round, 4 boxes in one, lots of designs and shapes. I was looking around and saw this beautiful steel utensil holder. The holder came with a host of seemingly vital kitchen utensils like spoons, knives, Chimta/Flat-headed long tongs, serving spoons, the entire works. I enquired about the price and was overjoyed when it was just under my budget and so I bought it . I went to the marriage hall and meet my friends and they are all curious as to what I was going to give the groom.When I told them it was a utensil holder, they wanted to see it and I had to unwrap it right there in the hall. Now as my friends were checking out my gift, all the ladies who were seated in the hall, started staring at me. You see these ladies are very curious when it comes to steel utensils. ( he winks) .One old lady came up to me and asked me, “ Son, how much did you give for that steel all- in- one holder ? “,when she heard the price she smiled and said “ You are doing a good thing by giving them these steel utensils. Every time they prepare or sit for lunch they will think of you. May Lord Krishna bless you “. Murthy lets out a deep sigh. I smile and Mr. Murthy continues” I must have wasted your time, here is your gift, all wrapped” .I pay for the idol and give him another of my charming smiles and bid him goodbye.