Need a haricut....

Found these really funny lines.... You either have to lose weight or make more friends -- six pall bearers isn't going to cut it. She is so fat, he danced with her for half an hour before he realized she was still sitting down. There was a hijacking this afternoon. They hijacked a bus filled with Japanese tourists. But thank God, they got over two thousand pictures of the hijackers. And we are told in the Scriptures that at the beginning of time the Lord said, "Let there be light." But I've checked this out with a number of eminent biblical scholars. The Lord's complete statement was as follows: "Let there be light. Well, maybe not all day." You can lead a horse to water -- but before you push him in, just stop and think how a wet horse smells. If her lips are on fire and she trembles in your arms, forget her. She's got malaria.